I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book. - Groucho Marx

Inseminoid, or In space nobody can hear you make a rip-off of Alien

by Johnathon Davis
April 10, 2017

When Ridley Scott’s classic sci-fi/horror masterpiece Alien was unleashed to an unsuspecting public in 1979, production companies wanted their own similar feature to grab a piece of a lucrative new pie. Z-list movie companies were by far the most prolific and uninventive in this area. Inseminoid was unleashed upon the world with deservedly little fanfare in 1981, and hilariously is a Sir Run Run Shaw presentation- for any fans of Blade Runner, you probably remember his name on the Ladd Company logo at the beginning of the picture. Considering the budget of this movie was in the multi-hundreds, I’m pretty certain he had few problems finding the financing.

Seriously, what are the chances of that? Pretty slim, much like my chances of really remembering anything of substance from Inseminoid (which by the way took three hours for me to watch). It does have some really bizarre and cool bits in it though, so if you stick it out like I did yo will be rewarded at least a couple times to such thrills as dying due to lack of atmosphere and a lady saw off her own foot because she’s simply too lazy and whiny to do a simple suit repair and wait for rescue. Oh and a sort of chest burster thingy.There’s also some supernatural mumbo-jumbo thrown in there too somewhere. It also features the most gratuitous use of plastic milk crates painted various colors and stacked up to make future girders and such that I have ever seen outside of my old bedroom five years ago.

Anyways, Alien was a pretty huge cash cow for 20th Century Fox (as I already explained), as well as its sequel. Anything went so long as it was in space or had the word ALIEN prominently in the title. This was especially true when it came to the then brand new VHS rental market. Take Return of the Alien’s Deadly Spawn for example (AKA The Deadly Spawn, which is truly amazing). The creatures in the flicks generally ranged between really legit to no better than a tube sock dipped i foam rubber and put onto the end of a broom handle. The Alien in Inseminoid actually doesn’t look all that bad, and it’s pretty safe to assume that the largest share of the budget went to the creature effects (all three of them). That and maybe the catering so everybody could eat lunch.

Is this film godd and/or very memorable? I do not think so. There is bound to be someone out there who will disagree but I think this would be really palatable if friends and beer were involved in the viewing process. The pacing is slow I could throw a hotdog down it. That being said however the actors do a pretty decent job with the otherwise flaccid and lackluster script/story/costumes/sets they were given in the end, so it could have been worse?

You be the judge!

Johnathon lives in Portland, Oregon. He makes collages. He also writes things for Network Awesome, as well as his weekly movie review blog which can be found at http://fshomevideo.blogspot.com. You should read it, it's really terrific.